Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
