This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
