Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
