"it" just moved
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
