Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions

  (310): View more from California

  i wish

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  (323): are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions (310): i wish http://tfl.nu/mg2v
  Replies (6) Good night (921) Bad night (2906)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  i just google imaged poop.

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  (865): i just google imaged poop. http://tfl.nu/6d8g
  Replies (17) Good night (822) Bad night (2818)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead

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  (513): I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead http://tfl.nu/yu41
  Replies (17) Good night (6219) Bad night (1175)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.

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  (815): I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore. http://tfl.nu/ecds
  Replies (35) Good night (2523) Bad night (5077)
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick

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  (831): No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick http://tfl.nu/r1nb
  Replies (37) Good night (1694) Bad night (8024)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester

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  (405): just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester http://tfl.nu/cozs
  Replies (3) Good night (959) Bad night (2650)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.

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  (714): She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse. http://tfl.nu/v3q7
  Replies (8) Good night (1102) Bad night (2223)
• Favorite

  (+32): View more from Belgium

  we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump

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  (+32): we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump http://tfl.nu/362x
  Replies (4) Good night (1012) Bad night (1343)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?

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  (760): I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that? http://tfl.nu/6xle
  Replies (6) Good night (763) Bad night (2146)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.

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  (269): I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now. http://tfl.nu/er1x
  Replies (7) Good night (1335) Bad night (766)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.

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  (716): The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West. http://tfl.nu/935n
  Replies (6) Good night (1311) Bad night (560)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."

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  (832): I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung." http://tfl.nu/1h35
  Replies (14) Good night (1940) Bad night (622)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?

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  (989): So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me? http://tfl.nu/cm4x
  Replies (8) Good night (489) Bad night (842)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.

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  (706): Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow. http://tfl.nu/th57
  Replies (0) Good night (575) Bad night (303)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?

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  (212): We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay? http://tfl.nu/9bs2
  Replies (2) Good night (962) Bad night (272)

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