Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
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