I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
is that a dick in a sweater?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
