Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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