if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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