Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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