There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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