Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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