you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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