oh god the rape fog is back!
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
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He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
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that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
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