guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
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