You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
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while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
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I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs