Little spoons don't ask big questions
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
