I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
