I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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