HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
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Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
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It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
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