come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
he shaved USA in his pubs
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
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