By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
