fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
