best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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