I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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