how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
