God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
