The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I think i got beer on your cat.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
