You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
