By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize