we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Just pee around me
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
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