But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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