Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
