I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
We need a shit load of segways right now
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that