I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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