pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
