just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
