is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Randomize
