So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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