...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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