the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
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Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
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Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Floor bacon is actually really good
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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