He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
You were trust falling into bushes
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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