VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
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Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I supernannyed him into submission
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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