Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
only you would photoshop your dick
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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