is your mom at the bar?
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
