so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
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