Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Randomize
