Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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