yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
