i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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