I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
